Identity
It is the quest of life to get to the truth of who we are, why we are here and where we are going. Identity is the answer to who we are. Knowing the foundational truth of our identity will position and posture us to be in the fullness of who we were created to be. Identity begins at the cellular level-literally: spirit, soul and body. As created beings created in the likeness of The Creator, we carry the spiritual DNA of God Himself. Our soul is the center of being that is anchored by spirit and carried by body. It is in the soul that we receive and release the joy and the pain of our life. Our body is the house we live in while we walk through this earth realm; it both holds and releases the issues of life which come from our heart.
While our Heavenly identity comes from our spirit, our earthly identity comes from what possesses our soul: the good and bad and the difficult unanswered questions between both. From the womb we receive every component that makes up our entire identity; they come first and foremost from our mother and father.
To best understand how this generation of inheritance of identity we will look at both our father and mother’s role in shaping who we are. Our father’s by design and role bestow upon us the foundation of identity. We inherit the name of our fathers and carry them from generation to generation. Fathers are designed to protect and lead us in their footsteps so to carry their lineage. Our mother’s by design and role bestow upon us the second pillar to our identity which is our self-worth and self-image. Mother’s are designed to nurture and cultivate the gifts we carry from God.
Each were designed with God-given roles to carry out a majestic plan that God has for each of us. I’d like to share briefly on the differences on the male role and the female role in relation to mothers and fathers as well as the connection to our mind and heart.
I was given a profound revelation last year about the male and female connection in relation to the mind and heart . I shared that the mind has a male role in the inner being, being the leader of the soul realm. The heart has a female role in the inner being, being the yielded vessel of the soul realm. Both our mind and heart pour into and draw from one another in the intricate intertwining of the inner being of spirit, soul and heart. What’s important to know here is that the condition of both of these is of utmost importance for the health of our whole self. Learning how they function- spiritually, mentally, emotionally, and physically, will posture you to learn how receive and cultivate the blessings of our earthly inheritance from our parents and release and process the inherited brokenness from our earthly guardians.
Our identity is the sum of both our beauty and our brokenness. Our life journey is learning how to bring self into the homeostasis that we were created to function in. Getting on the time line from brokenness to restoration is where this transformation begins.
Take a moment to think about your family. What are some things that come to mind when you think about your upbringing and your life presently? Some of these things may be painful, others nostalgic. What is common is that we all have experienced both, as we are all people recovering from something that broke us from broken people. This is the human experience.
Today, we will delve into the origins of inherited brokenness :
The Father Wound and The Mother Wound.
In my teaching and mentoring I share a revelation that I received on my own journey of inner healing. I call them the 2 pillars of our brokenness: our childhood and upbringing and our collective life experience.
When we understand that the reason we have endured what we have is because we live in a broken world filled with broken people- that means you, that means me.
We all carry our mother and father’s inherited brokenness. Knowing this about ourself is like taking fire in your hands to purify your life to gold. It postures you to learn how to uncover the roots of pain, so that you may be able to heal. It also positions you to forgive. These two spaces are vital to unlearning and relearning how to live in holistic health.
The Father Wound
Each of us have amazing and astounding stories of our parental connections. Some of us have great and close relationships with our parents an some of us do not. Some of us are estranged from our parents. Some of us have strained relationships. Some of us have parents who have passed away.
Every dynamic and relationship is important. Remember this.
Fathers are imparted with a foundational role in our lives- by divine inheritance. The principle does not change based on our relationship health. It is. What is important to know here is that regardless of the healthy function or unhealthy dysfunction is that we can be restored in our identity.
The father wound is the wound that reaches us to the core. It is the foundation of self. The degree to which we were loved and honored by our earthly father is the degree to which we will understand how we love and honor ourself and in turn honor others. An encouragement I’d like to share now is that even if you did not receive the love and honor you were created to have through your earthly father, there is a Heavenly Father through whom it comes from and whom you can still learn from.
It is from our fathers that we learn or miss the value of our core identity. Fathers are created to protect and impart vision and legacy. We are bestowed with identity by the mere tradition of inheriting and carrying their name.
Many of us did not experience a healthy relationship with our earthly fathers. In fact, most of us have had some level of pain in the father/child relationship. Regardless of where you may land on the scale of dysfunction , this will minister to your heart and bring healing to your mind.
The broken relationship you had with your father shaped and formulated your view of self.
If you had a father who constantly spoke words of discouragement and criticism, these words have subconsciously created the mental tape you play in default mode. If your father relationship was governed by tension and anxiety, you may have found yourself feeling insecure about yourself and your ability to speak up for yourself or learn healthy boundaries. If your father was physically abusive in any way, you may have found yourself needing validation in ways that have only compounded your need for affirmation and acceptance, leading you to a deeper pit of uncertainty of your identity.
The Mother Wound
Mothers are also imparted with a foundational role in our lives- by divine inheritance. The principle does not change based on our relationship health. It is. What is important to know here is that regardless of the healthy function or unhealthy dysfunction is that we can be restored in our identity.
The Mother wound is the wound that reaches us to the core as well. It is the second foundation of self. The degree to which we were loved and honored by our earthly mother is the degree to which we will understand how we love and honor ourself and in turn honor others. An encouragement I’d like to share now is that even if you did not receive the love and honor you were created to have through your earthly mother, there is a Heavenly Father through whom it comes from and whom you can still learn from.
Mothers bestow self worth and self image. It is through our mothers that we learn or miss the value of taking care of ourselves. Mothers are created to nurture and cultivate the heart treasures within. We are bestowed with the identity of our self-worth and self-awareness through our mothers.
Similarly, many of us did not experience a healthy relationship with our earthly mothers . In fact, most of us have had some level of pain in the mother/child relationship. Regardless of where you may land on the scale of dysfunction , this will minister to your heart and bring healing to your mind.
It’s important to remember that wherever you are in your life journey, your relationship with your parents, their presence or absence in your life and the relationship you have with yourself- healing is your portion and available for you now.
The remedy to the pain of our father and mother wound is to acknowledge our own inherited brokenness and to understand theirs. When we accept this we are postured to learn to forgive as we put love and honor in their rightful and healing place.
Love y’all,
Beautiful Jewel
